The cycle was never-ending.

For him, at least.

You see, he would always go about his life. He would focus on bettering it. The piece that was always consistent is that she was the part that he craved when he wanted better. She did everything he never thought he’d love.

How does that even work?

How could you love something that you never knew existed?

He thought about it often. This meant that there could be so many things ahead of us in life that we had no idea could change our lives. Imagine that. It’s a serious “possibilities are endless” type of thing. That’s fucking crazy, or was he the only one to think so?

You see, there are not many constants in his life. He could depend on him to get all of this motivation for something immediately. He could rely on losing that motivation sooner than later. After a little bit of time, you could expect him to regret losing motivation. That’s when the regret for the loss of motivation becomes the other side of procrastination. He wants to get everything done in a hurry. He rushes through everything, and everything beautiful is missed. He loses sight of the challenges; he loses sight of the journey. He forgets the reason he’s doing this in the first place.

This time, he has decided to do it differently. Sure, there’s a ton of motivation once again. What he’d do differently is practice discipline. It was time to accept that there would be a day in which he didn’t want to get the usual shit done. Normal shit could be his work. Normal shit could be the ordinary days of love. This is when he’d do it even more. On the days when he didn’t feel like putting his running shoes on, he’d tie them even tighter to lose a little bit of circulation on his foot. On the days he stared at the shower, waiting until his brain was ok to touch the cold water, he’d jump in.

This time it was going to be different.