The art of detachment.

I learned a lot of things when I was in school; I still learn a lot. The more I learn, the more I realize I will never understand everything. That’s always bothered me. You know how you feel all itchy when you roll over in the grass? It feels cool, but it feels a little uncomfortable if you stop moving for a while. That’s how I feel about I’ll never know everything.
For a long time, I thought my dad knew it all. I painted a picture that my father was the most intelligent individual on this planet, but he was also fantastic. And more importantly, he thought I was cool.
And then, when I realized he was just a human and didn’t know it all, I was shook.
He’s always told me I need to be a better person than him and not be like him, but that’s a lot of pressure.
Now, I’m practicing the art of detachment.
The idea that I have to do everything perfectly, I’m letting it go.
The relationships I could’ve helped fix and tried a little bit more? I’m letting that go too.
The shit that I never did and kept putting off? Yup, I’m letting it go.

That’s what I’m figuring out is what keeps me in this vicious cycle: I need to improve, I need to improve, and I need to improve. It gnaws at me day in and day out.

I don’t need it. Nothing in this world is mine. I never had much when I was a kid, and now I have everything, yet it feels empty now and then. Maybe that’s just the practice of gratitude that I forget to implement daily.

I have everything I’ve ever needed, and I’m 31 years old and just figuring that out.

So, today, I’m letting go of everything that upset me. I’m letting go of everything that’s made me happy. I’m letting go of everything to choose to chase the moment I’m in. No more overthinking. Let’s see.