This is it.

Have you ever run a marathon? Maybe just a tiny 5k or a light jog with a goal. There’s something about the moment when you first get a glace at the finish line. I’m not sure what the scientific name is or if there is a scientific name for this, to begin with, but it’s a good feeling overall.

That’s where I’m at right now. I’ve gotten to see the finish line for this marathon, and I’m feeling some crazy sort of energy from it. I have had this anxious feeling driving me crazy, and I have had a hard time expressing whatever the fuck it is that’s been driving me this crazy in the most silent way ever. I think I could finally admit that this move has been everything that’s been running my mind. I can’t even think about the end of the year without my palms getting sweaty. I’m driving myself nuts. It’s a good kind of crazy.

God has been having these conversations with me, and I’ve been listening, and it’s hard to try and explain how it’s all being processed internally. Still, I’ve concluded that although it would be nice to have someone try and understand, I don’t need to be understood.

My entire life, I’ve been living just to feel some sort of understanding. I’ve been this way since I could remember, and it’s made me the person that I am today.

With all that being said, today is the day. The first day I could see the finish line, and I was going to sprint my ass to the end for a quick change of shoes to get back in the race.