Is That Even Possible?

Maybe I’ve fallen in love so much that I’ve forgotten how it’s supposed to be.

Was love meant to be felt as much as I think I’ve felt it? And how often can a heart be broken or let down before it’s in too many little pieces that can’t be put together.

How often would I find myself falling in love with you before I tell myself that’s enough? How long should I stay loving you before I move on? How’s that supposed to work?

I would say that I’m supposed to have moved on by now, and sometimes I feel I have. Suddenly, it’s like a blow to the gut, which makes me remember all the positive things I want to forget.

Those positive things probably shouldn’t be enough for me to want to forget why we can’t be living in love. I should forget, but I guess I haven’t always done what I should do.

I’m happy, and I think that’s a practice, so living without you has been okay day after day. Some days are more challenging when all I see is you in what isn’t.

Maybe I’m tired of being in love. Maybe I’m tired of being out of love.

Maybe I’m done with questioning whether that’s possible in the end.