I’ve done so much for myself, but why’s there always feeling like something else is missing?

What could be missing for a motherfucker who has everything he’s ever wanted and more? What more does a dude have to do to feel complacent for just a little while? What does a motherfucker have to do not to feel so rushed? What else does a motherfucker have to do to just rest and let his mind slow down for a few hours?

What does it feel like being around me?

How could anybody enjoy anytime with me? How am I able to entertain anybody if I can’t figure out my mind? How does one figure out the rest the key to making the world a better place so he can start paying attention to everything in his world?

It’s one thing to be able to try and perfect your life from the moment you figure out that life isn’t all you thought it could be. It’s one thing to try and improve your life for those that have given up so much for you. It’s one thing trying to figure out how to pay back those people that have given up their life for you. It’s another thing to figure out how to give back to those that were given a short end of the stick somewhere else.

I often think about how we, as human species, focus so much on trying to do better for ourselves, but we’ve stopped paying attention to how we could improve life for everyone else. How ironic is it that I started writing about how I want to make my life better, right? Damn near hypocritical. Then again, that’s pretty much the story of my life. I am trying to focus on making my life better while figuring out how to improve the rest of the world. The older I get, the more I realized that it’s damn near impossible to keep both things in order. The men I looked up to that changed the world, sacrificed so much with their family. I don’t know how I would be able to do it; maybe I’ll figure it out sooner than later.