Back when we’re young we either receive one of two lessons. One version is having your parents divorce and and another is having your parents stay together. I’m the latter. I think it impacts you in ways you don’t really pay attention to until you’re looking to get married yourself. I’ve read that there’s a 50% chance of married couples getting a divorce and I could be wrong, but that percentage is probably rising as time and society progresses. Now, that could be for various reasons like technology which just gives you tons of options right at your fingertips. Another argument that could be made is that marriage is just something that’s so old that we really should not be following that tradition. Whichever way you look at it there’s a problem that needs our solving. 

As a kid, when I was asked what I would like to be when I grew up, the answer was always consistent. I want to be a good husband and a good father. Just like my old man. If you’re curious, the occupation piece always varied between being an astronaut, being a lawyer, or a best selling author. While my occupation goals have changed (I still dream of writing that book), I still have the goal of being a great husband and a great father. When I was 13 I would always say that I wanted to accomplish that goal by 22 and whoever I was with at that time would be the woman I’d spend the rest of my life with. Luckily, that did not happen and when I say luckily I don’t mean it exactly because of who I was dating, I meant mostly because of me. I definitely was not ready at that time. I was completely immature and I had many lessons to learn and one of the major ones was that the grass is greener where you water it. If I could go back to speak to my 22 year old self, I’d high five him for being patient because when the time comes to give my 100% into being a father and into being a husband, it’ll be completely worth it. 

As I stated earlier, back when I was 13, I thought whoever was around during the right time would be the person I would marry. Now, I believe that I’m ready to get married and I’ve never put so much internal pressure on myself for a decision. I don’t want to be another statistic that adds to the amount of divorces. So, I’m going to take my time and figure out what compromises I can make in regards to building a family and hope my future wife finds the characteristics she always wanted in a partner and a co-parent.