Letter from your pops.

I hope that one day I’m able to read this to you when you get older, but in case I’m not, you can have someone else read on my behalf. I want to give you an idea of who I was before you came along in my life. I may have to add more to this because, at this point, you’re nowhere near being thought of. Here goes nothing.

Your dad was the most humble, egotistical person ever. He was confident in times in which he did not need to be convinced. He was humble in times where he needed to be humble. He thought he was doing everything right, and even though he looked for ways to improve all the time, he also was looking forward to hearing about how great he was.

Your dad was a selfish giver. He thought that he was supposed to change the world. When he was even younger, he would see people on tv making changes and think to himself that he should be the one making those moves. He always felt that he was supposed to be first, and if he wasn’t first, then it just didn’t matter. He wanted to set the bar still, and if he had to set the bar higher, he had to make sure it was untouchable. Ultimately, he got over that, but it took him a little while.

Your dad was a big-time music guy. He loved everything. I hope Taylor Swift is still a thing when you get older. She was the shit. Your dad bought a karaoke machine at the age of 18, and the first karaoke CD that he purchased was an early Taylor Swift CD. He may tell you that’s because it was the only one available at Best Buy, but that’s not true. As soon as he found that CD he knew he had to buy it. Now he can sing songs like Breathe, Forever & Always, and Jump Then Fall without needing the lyrics. Side note kids, if you haven’t heard her album Fearless, I suggest you get into that. Seriously though, you should listen to Tupac Shakur, J.Cole, and mixtape Wale. Those were the jams that helped your pops become the person he was. You’re never too cold for some T-Swizzy, though. Never forget that.

Your dad was a big coward but hated having fears. He was terrified of heights, so he went sky-diving against your grandma’s wish. He disliked needles, so he always went to get his blood drawn. He also hated speaking up, so he took up classes at Toastmasters at work. I’m still not sure if he’s over those fears, but he likes to say that his fears no longer control him.

Your dad was a ton of things, kids. He was a friend that loved time with his family and himself, so it made him inaccessible. He was grumpy but realized that he didn’t need to yell to make a point. Ultimately, he’s loved you since before he could imagine what you would look like before he could guess what you’d act like and before he could imagine feeling you kick your momma’s stomach.