How often have we heard someone say that their partner, their family member, or their friends deserve better?
I think I’ve caught myself saying this often.
“She deserves better.”
Such a stupid saying.
It’s so much easier wishing for someone else to come into their life than to be the person because that would take work.
We can’t imagine how much it would cost us to become a better person, so we just wish for that person to change.
We can’t fight our urges to act out, but we can wish them to figure out what they need to do to be happier on their own.
It’s silly. It is.
I want to be a better person, I do. I’ve wished for most of the people in my life to receive better friends, better siblings, or a better son.
I have all that power in my hand, and I still didn’t want to do it?
How does that make sense?
It doesn’t.
I should be a better person.
I should learn to communicate better.
I should learn how to be upfront.
I should learn how to voice my opinions more often.
Instead, I allow silence to rule me.
I give in to my thoughts and overthink how to explain things.
I lose the fight to everything happening in my mind about what could go wrong.
Even though I’ve had most situations work out for the best (they always do), I seem to have taken advantage of that luck.
The problem is that it will always catch up with me, and for the most part, it still has.
So from now on, instead of saying I wish I could be a better person, I’m going to work on being that better person.
I’m not going to miss out on something that I know I could be happy with only because I tell myself I’m not ready.
If I’m not ready now, it’s because I don’t want to be.
I guess I never understood that.
I always thought there would be some sort of sign that would put me in my place to make sure I knew it was time.
Now, I know that’s just an illusion, a trick that my mind played on me.
No more. That won’t happen again.
From now on, I’m going to be everything that I wish I could be.